Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Cooking Up A Storm

Fascinating is the word! Savoury, delightful, arousing....! Mere haath ka khana...simply mesmerizing! Finger lickin' just not good enough! I'm such an enormous success in culinary arts that even a raw ingredient blessed enough to be merely touched by me accidentally is regarded to be a coveted memento in the world of food lovers! People are crazy I tell you :') Can you believe it, I'm so loved that they rush to give me Michelin stars even for a Maggi boiled by me :D (even though I don't run any place!) But then, they are justified :) For I add my special touch to every single thing I prepare, putting all my heart into it, slicing each vegetable with care and precision, sprinkling just the right amount of herbs and spices, tossing and baking, coating and frying, leaving my mark on every creation and never failing to innovate :)

So much so that, I have been dubbed the Nigella Lawson of my circle! :D Even in family get-togethers, I'm the one in demand when stomachs grumble. Bored of the same old food, want something new? Then Archika is the one for you. I guess the sole most important reason contributing to my popularity is that I can take the simplest and the most humble of ingredients and turn them into a delicacy :) Akhir, jaadu haathon mein hota hai ;)

Not just this, I am so amazing and great that you'd be blown away by the blast of brilliant light that I emit. My kid brother begs me to cook! Hahaha :D (Mom gets a tad bit jealous though, but then, the happiness that I see on my baby brother's face as he delights himself with the yummy food brings tears of satisfaction to my eyes and flush me with motherly pleasure :') ) My dad never stops praising me, and my mom is proud to have a genius for a pupil.

Well, keeping these unimportant little things aside, let us move on to the cake incident of a few days back. Given what an expert I am in the kitchen, I set about baking a cake, a new challenge. Even before the batter had been prepared, the delicious smell could be felt floating about. The furniture swayed about with joy in anticipation of what was to come, the walls barely managed to hold themselves back and the plants literally grew greener because of the enchanting aroma. (Dear readers, please wipe off the thread of drool hanging from your mouth. How much ever you might be lusting for the above-mentioned cake, that saliva is disgusting.) When the batter had been prepared, it was time to bake. But there was a minor problem. I could not locate a glass dish in my vicinity (this ailment is called partial specific blindness, where the sufferer turns blind specifically to the object being looked for, even if it is dangled near their nose; and the partial blindness continues unless the object has been looked for successfully by younger brother/sister or parent). So, not allowing myself to be defeated by a glass dish, I decided to go ahead with...a plastic bowl. Now the thing is, my brilliance is marred by a lack of experience. And so, when I set the cake in the oven, this is what happened in 1 minute and 37 seconds...


Yes...it melted :p Thankfully I noticed within that time that the bowl was deforming, god alone knows what would have happened in 50 minutes :p

Well, my mom then finally gave me a glass dish, and I did complete the cake. Only it was burnt :p It was later thrown away, barely touched :p (It was as hard and crunchy and crispy as a biscuit, maybe that's what I should have said it was...well, another time!)

But my love for cooking continues. Everytime I even step into the kitchen, I message Corazon "I made something! Yay XD". Initially, he would say, "Oh nice! Was it very tasty?" Over time, he has learnt to ask "Was it edible??" :p

That's not all. My dedication to become a great cook can be illustrated by the fact that ever since the vacations after the Xth Boards began, my dadi took it upon herself to introduce me to the kitchen, and we started off with chapattis. After three years and the combined efforts of mommy and dadi, this is what I make even today:


Notice the burnt and the raw patches adjacent to each other. Gives a nice contrast :D But then, at least it is perfectly round :p Dadi and mom shake their heads in exasperation. "Shadi kaise hogi" is what they say :p Growing up, I have noticed that they are more concerned about my future in-laws that don't even exist than anything else :p Women, I tell you! And to chidko jale pe namak, my baby brother takes a lot of interest in the kitchen and rolls out amazing paranthas. He is ten, I am eighteen :p

Sometimes, mommy thinks aloud to herself "kash archi ladka hoti aur anshu (my brother) ladki hota". I can't help but agree. The worst thing is, she can't accept the fact that I'm a total loser in the kitchen like I accepted it a long time back. Gosh, what to say of her nagging persistence to teach me "at least something"? Fascinating is the word :p
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